Ms. Alyvia-Mae

Alyvia is growing up TOOOOO TOOOOO fast.  she is already trying to crawl.  She enjoys jumping.   Brings back memory of when Hazel was just a little baby. Alyvia loves bouncy.  If you do it.  Her and Hazel just bend there knees once they know they are being bounced. With a happy face and giggles keep going mom your doing a great job I AM JUST ENJOYING it.    So similar and so cute!!
   Hazel has been calling lala "LOL or young Lady" lately.  Alyvia loves to eat. Now when Alyvia wakes up from her nap and she sees me she smiles.  Then realize i'm not coming for her even if im right next to her.  She cries like someones pinched her.  So dramatic.  What a happy baby she is once mom is over.  Earlier tonight as i was putting the girls to bed.  Hazel kept begging me to hold her while she sleeps.  Wait till Lala is down and I will hold you.  Once alyvia was sleeping I scoot over by hazel and snuggle close to her.  I peek back over to check on Alyvia.  Her eyes were slighly opened and gives me this cutest precious smile.  I smile back and cuddle more with Hazel.  I felt had a feeling that someone was staring at me.  You know that feeling.  It just throws you off.  So i had to check so it can stop bothering me.  Sure enough it was alyvia.  .  I  turned back over because Hazel was almost asleep then I would come back and snuggle with dear Lala.
    Guess who got Jealous!!! Her face just got puzzled and then she let out a cry like someone pinched her or a starving baby.  Of course it woke Hazel up.  MOm please don't go back over.  Okay than haze just hurry and go to sleep.  How did Alyvia Understand that.  Cries Louder.  Come on girl.  I can hear you but you got to share mommy to  you know...  NOPE i wont says lala.. and guess what she got her way  why... because she still a little baby.  You just wait young girl... that day will come when you will have to wait.  Enjoy it while you have it.

Here is another good one.  Alyvia is quite mischievious and smart.  Hazel loves to play with her.  Lala got to the point where she just likes having mom around next to her all the time.  Alyvia I can't do that I have things to do.  things to put away.  Hazel won't hurt you .  It seems as soon as i turn my head I hear a cry.  Hazel hurries and looks at me to see what my reaction will be is to punish hazel... Alyvia hurries and turns her head towards me like come get me mom.  I felt like Hazel didn't hurt her so I let it go, but watched Alyvia extra closely to see what she was doing.  As soon as I calmed her down.  I went away still watching her.  Lala Scream loud out of nowhere with no warning Hazel jumps and alyvia turns her head towards me with a pouty face.  Seriously Lala You are a little stinker trying to get your sissy in trouble.  NO way, I caught you.  Hazel is too good to you!

Fun.. things about our girls

As Hazel was helping me fix perfect food.  She loves that stuff always asks if she can make it.  As she was stirring the perfect food in the cup she yells dad, YOUR AWESOME!  Dad comes in the kitchen and says Yes, you are awesome Hazel.  She corrects him and says.  Dad No!  YOU are awesome! K.  I think it was a good reminder having a 2 year old remind us that we need to give our self credit and accept that we to are awesome.
     
          Alyvia is getting so tall.  She enjoys bouncing, jumping up and down.  Alyvia loves Hazel.    She actually gets really sad if Hazel isn't around to play with her.  One day Hazel was out playing with her cousins and Lala woke up from her nap.  I would call Hazels name,  Lala looking all around every time I would call Hazel.  when she could not find her she had this sad face like where's Hazel.  Alyvia loves Hazel.  Hazel is really good to her sister.

   Dad taught Hazel how to say.. BECAUSE I"m Batman!!  so when ever you say why.. She say BECAUSE i'm batman!  Now she likes to add a little twist to it and tease her dad.. Dad say Why?  She say because I'm Mario!! No haze say your batman.. No I'm Mario.  She is teasing him this whole time.  What a character Hazel is.

Hazel enjoys watching mom do her Hair when I do.  Today,  I see Hazel scrunching her hair.. Hazel what are you doing.  " Looking pretty mom!"  Yes, you do look pretty Hazel.  She had pump alot of bathroom handsoap and was using that to make her hair look pretty.  She was to cute.  Man does that soap REEk.  I'm trying to get rid of it and she did a really good job of it.

  This is Alyvia at 3 months and Haze 2years

I love you Skits and PeeWee

ThanksGiving

There's so much that I am grateful for.  I am grateful for my Bobby and my two Girls.  Hazel and Alyvia are the best girls in the world.  They make me smile and worth living for.   Thanksgiving was great.. Grandma made her usual homemade thanksgiving dinner.  Yes, it was fabulous and Delicious.

   I want to be a better mom, wife, and a person, so I made changes in my life to make me do the best I can to raise my girls.  I am going to carry on a spiritual way of viewing life.  Excercise more meditation and allow more time for growth and learning by quiet time.  I will do my best to look and critique problems in a positive way.  I will make alot mistakes on the way, I will do my best to catch myself and do better.  NO one is perfect that's why pencils have erasers.  I love it.
 My life is not perfect But I am Grateful for the many thing in life.  Hazel has been teething.  She is a piece of cupcake so sweet and kind.  Full of compassion and humility.  I am learning to be more like miss little Hazel. She is a very incrediable teacher.  I learn alot from you Haze.  Thank you for being such a wonderful example to me.  Alyvia,  even as a little infant I can learn from you.  Smile and giggle often.  We are all little babies.  Act as if life is just pure with love and spread love out to others.  Thanks Alyvia for you special treat of admiration.
Dad even when you say you struggle.  I still think you are wonderful.  I learn that life is hard but to never give up.  Keep chugging.  Life is beautiful.

I have alot to learn.. Keeping my ears, eyes, heart open to anything that will encourgage me to be on the right path.

LIfe is just wonderful

Grandma and Grandpa came up for Dezera's Baptism.  I went back down to Boulder with them.  Hazel was pretty excited.  Hazel loves being down in Boulder, It gives her the opportunity to explore the world.  Grandpa gave her a kitten.  It's a soft black kitten.  She calls it "Kitty".  We haven't been able to spend much time with Grandma and Grandpa because they been pretty busy.  Last week they were busy getting the cows and calves together.  They were selling them.  It was a cold last  week, wind was blowing.  This week then went up by Brigham City for a sealing of a friend.  We only got to see them for a morning and then left down to St. George for a few days.  They come back on Sat.  

     I was able to spend some good time with the girls.  Grandpa left her a chore which was to feed his cats on gone while he was gone.  Every morning she wakes up super early I mean 4:30 if im lucky 5.  She just wants to get up and go eat breakfast.   Of course she knows I will., sneakingly wakes up Lala.  Lala smiles and is up till around 8. We go make her breakfast.  Anxiously, ask mom can I feed the cats and dogs.  She knows her routine.  She takes the cat food into the cat dish. Dog food to two seperate dishes, she knows that Allie and Hank won't eat together.  Then she comes back in and gets a few bread and sneaks it to the dog. MOM they are Hungry!    

      I made has noodles and peas,  after talking with her dad on the phone, I go over to see that Hazel ate all the noodles and Left the peas.  Hazel, you need to eat you peas to.  She says "No! mom."  Why not?  her reply "BECAUSE IM BATMAN!"  Batman doesn't eat that! Yuck.  I'm batman mom.  Gosh, can I call Dad?...  This little girl is quite the character.  

   It's been difficult being able to be on top of things these past couple days.  Some How i got really sick and can't really seem to move around well.  I have the shivers and my body is so tense.  I'm not quite sure what caused this, but Dad think it might be the IUD..  I laughed at that one. hahaha.    Well I do my best the best I can.  So far my angels have been helping to get through the day.  Thanks Angels.  

    We miss Dad wish he was able to be here to enjoy the moment we have down here.  We sure love him even when things are going rough for him.  I know that if we just do what we need to things will fall together.  

   Miss Alyvia, happens to be growing like a weed.  A very cute adorable weed.  She is so wanting to crawl so badly.  She reaches for food that might be in your hand.  She will walk backwards in the walker that Grandma has.  She is just a happy baby.  She loves it when Grandpa takes her and plays with her.  She always gives him a big warm smile.  I think that makes his day.  She loves getting in the bath with Hazel.  

Hazel's sleep over

Hazel was invited to a sleepover party at Anna's house cousins: Dezy and Annie were there.  Hazel waited anxiously all week for this day.  She was excited.  I think that she probably thought hanging out not actually sleepover without mommy and daddy. Most parents would be nervous for the child at a sleepover making sure they will have fun, they miss parents.  I knew Haze would enjoy herself.  But not me.  I enjoyed her dressing her up in a lion costume and painting her face.  She looked so cute.  Poor baby she had a fever the night before, her back teeth were coming in so her nose kept running, which smeared her paint on her face.  She looked adorable.
   Dropping her off was just sad.  After coming home, mom and dad were finding any excuse to see if we can  go pick her up.  But we both new if she's having fun we didn't want to take away her enjoyment.  I've always had Haze by me the only other time she spent the night away from me was when I had Alyvia.
  It sounded as if she had a blast.  She was hyper had a pillow fight, watched a movie, made cookies.  Woke up early like usual and had pancakes.
 Lala couldn't get to sleep not having Haze by her she woke up early to.  I figured we probably would be able to sleep in.  Not the case.    Dad and MOm missed Hazel so much.  WE love you Hazel and so proud of you!  We are super excited that your back.  Your my pee wee wee ...wee wee  bird... Tweeety tweety twinkle toes.

Understanding Others

I came across this quote.. "You never understand a person until you consider things from his point of view"- Harper Lee

This is a line we all use from time to time, "I know how you feel." But honestly, do we really know how someone feels?  Even if you have been in a similar situation as someone else,, such as having a family member pass away, being the head of a company, or a parent of a newborn, every person reacts differently. But even if you don’t “know how they feel,” you can understand their thoughts and feelings. However, if we do not see someone’s point of view, how can we understand them? Why curse out the slow car in front of you? They might just be having a rough day, but you have no idea of knowing that. So next time you are upset at someone, try to realize what it means to understand a person before jumping to conclusions about them.

As a mother you sense when your kids feel uneasy before they even come to you and say, I don't feel well.  This morning Hazel wakes up and says mom my teeth is hurting I have an Oweee.  I check her teeth couldn't see any sores.  Later after watching the way she acted.  She wasn't in her jumpy fun Hazel moods as usual.  running a little slower than usual, but still very happy.   I asked Hazel if could look at her mouth 1 more time. Yep, there's a tooth popping through.  Hazel been such a great girl, trying always to be nice but sometimes was just a tad to much and needed to hit Alyvia to help release some of her aches.  After telling Hazel that's not what we do, it's not nice.  Let's find another way to get your ache out.  Instantly she says Heveanly Father allalal!  That's a great idea Haze but we must say it in a more reverant way.  That seemed to help her. Hazel is learning 5-6 letter words now.  Her biggest word today that she learned was GLOOMY.    Struggled a little with the my she used to prounouncing it as my.  I have been having struggles with her math.  Adding numbers.  She doesn't quite get it but I am not going to give up.  I need to looked at as a challenge.  What other creative ways can I get her to show interest in learning adding.  PO I will use him.  He's a great stuff animal polar friend of Haze.  Hazel, if you don't want to play with me I'm going to have PO join me.  After watching that My focus and funness was on Po.  She politely asked if she could have a turn.  We then had wonderful time teaching each other how to add.

Alyvia sleeps 3 times a day.  The first thing after waking up from her nap is a little bit of milk.  Of course, Hazel perfers that she's spents the first few min with her.  Everytime this happens.  Alyvias first reaction is a smile at Hazel almost as if "you heard me awesome mom is on the way" then she starts looking around for me.  But Hazel has her in arms singing LALA Lollipop!! or Lala how you doing? good.  yah...  Alyvia 2nd impulse is screaming as loud as she can as if she's hurt or something totally dramatic I say.  Hazel then lets her go and says mom Lala wants chow!  After Lalas chow she is happy as can be willing to let Hazel scream at the top of her lungs.
 One of the cute things I've enjoyed with Lala these past few weeks is her soft sweet laughs.  She laughs and laughs when Hazel jumps on the bed and falls on her butt.

Judge

Judging is one of the hardest thing I often work at.  Everyone has there own weakness that needs to be tuned up.  Judging happens to be on top of my list.  It is a hard habit to break, but I know if I work on it everyday. The easier it does become to be less judgemental.  It's bad to say but sometimes I do not realize that I judged a thing, or someone.  It just happens until I step back and realize what I thought.  Thoughts, are the main point I'm targeting.  It's so happens when you think of things you judge an object if it's good or bad, if it's ugly or beautiful, if your smart or dumb, .. Sometimes I think I might mistaken judge as a choice.  Choice is what path you decide for whatever reason, But there's always judgment involved in it.  What if I decide Tomorrow I had a choice to either smoke or have a green smoothie.  When approaching this I then will look at it in this perspective, Well seeing how much people are dieing from smoking and how craspy their voice gets.  It's not healthy.  I think I will choose a green smoothie which will benefit my body with soothing energy.  Okay I am not making sense here.  The end with this section

Judging your partner, thinking of them as being wrong, is but a trick of the ego: “They are immature” or “selfish”, or "not reliable" or "unfaithful" or "afraid of my love", "...".
If you judge your partner from outside the perspective of the Oneness, separate from yourself, how can you really love them? Use your partner as a mirror to see yourself more intimately and deeply and start to feel that you are your partner and your partner is you, beyond any judgment. Begin to recognize and to accept yourself through them.  Alot of time when you judge your partners of "Why aren't you this", "I wish they were like this"  lalala when you think this way, Remember this is the time to cratique yourself.  What, How can I be a better person!  What is that I need to work on?  Why does that something push my button?  Write them down or meditate on it and see why it hurts you.  Are you being a tad dramatic?  After thinking about these things and working at it to fix yourself and how your viewing it.  If it's still a bother.  Approach your partner and let him how you been feeling.  Maybe it's misunderstanding.When you do approach them DON"T say You you you.... that won't solve an issue it's just adds on and become bigger.  Cheers!  

Bobby, Thanks for your hard work, I do miss you alot at home and wish we could spend more time with you .  I appreciate your effort of pushing yourself to become a better person!  You've come a long ways.  I'm so grateful to have a husband that wants and will work on to become better.  I know it was hard for you those first year.  Hey, I've seen so much growth in you and blessing are always coming our way when we are doing our part!  I love you Babe!  Just thinking of you right now and looking at our engagement pict that is posted on the our bedroom wall.  I got to say you do have a pretty smile!  Your wonderful to me!  I love you hun! Peace.  

Hazel says that your taking her to get rice and beans tomorrow :)  She is a cutie.  I had Alyvia watch you on a video I'd recorded of you three.  She just giggles with a big smile when she heard your voice.  Your the best dad for our kids.  They love you!  Thanks for putting in the effort even when your busy to spend some quality time with our girls.  

True Happiness comes from sharing our blessings with others

Hazel

My little pumpkin Hazel-Anne always does a great job of finishing my sentences.  Hazel is 2 years old reading at a 1st grade level going onto 2nd grade reading level. My babe enjoys and looks forward to her lessons.  She is so brilliant, smart, cute, beautiful.  She can count to 1-30, knows her colors, shapes, sequences, opposites.  She picks up things so fast.  I am so nervous everyday that I won't excel as her teacher because she is such a bright student. She is already smarter than I and she is only 2.
    Hazel loves her little lollipop sister.  She looks forward to holding her after her naps of course lala cries and cries when she hears Hazel first sing LALA o Lollipop!  very loud.  Seems after lala has her chow she enjoys having Haze sings loud in her face.  Hazel is kindhearted, helps lala out anyway she can.  Kisses her and asks if she is okay.

Hazel always says she want to ride the cow!  I say no hazel cows aren't fun to ride and you'll fall.  She says mom i just have to hold on tight!  Yes that's true.
   She loves watching bull riding.  Mom can i watch bull riding?  in the sweetest voice.  How can i resist when she says so cute.  Hazel is very polite.  Says Thank you when she recieves something.  She'll make sure you hear her say Thank you even if she has to SCREAM it :)

After putting lala down for a afternoon nap, I came downstairs just to see Hazel on top of the entertainment center with my iphone in her hand watching her pictures and videos that i've taken.   She loves pic and videos

the other day we went to trevors wedding.  Trevor went over to Hazel to talk.  Asked how she was doing.  She says, " im Hungry, i want to eat!"  Trevor didn't know what to say to that.  He went and brought some food which was really nice.  She politely Thanked Trevor!

Hazel loves to feel like she is in the conversation.  She will laugh so loud and think she is so funny when everyone is laughing at totally something different.  These small acts are things what makes me smile with adoration.

Hazel is pretty good about going to bed when asked.  I have to hold her and when I do I put as much love into her body letting her know that I love her so much!  Anyways, it seems before she completely falls asleeps she asks these question " Pancake tomorrow, go shopping tomorrow?, hold lala tomorrow, what will we do tomorrow i love you mom, I DO!"

Hazel loves to eat!  She is a good eater!.  she has the best personality!.

Im so grateful for Hazel.  She is worth getting up to every morning at 530 and play with.  If your respond to her in a nice way she will always respect you.  Hazel I want you to know I love you so much!  I want to be the best mommy for you! Thank you for being patient especially the first few month since lalas birth.  You showed me to compassion, patients, love, you cared for me during these time.  You helped me.  I appreciate it and I need to express it more often.  I will.  Thank you love,  thank you for choosing me to be your mommy!  I got the best girls in the whole world.  I love you

MOm

Overwhelming

My greatest goal in life is to be the best mom for my girls.  Where my girls can trust in me enough to guide them in the right direction.  We can be best friend and they tell me all there secrets and so on.  I want a really good relationship with them forever.  How can I have that?  First, I have to work on my own self.  What would I have liked in my Mother?  What do I not like what other mothers do.  Ask these question work on them and never let it get in the way.  Understand you will make alot of mistakes, but don't ever give up.  Once you fall get right back up and start again.  Take a breather if it's a pretty hard fall and mud  has written all over your face.  Wipe those tears, stay focus and move forward.  

 Life is challenging, but challenging is what makes our weakenesses in to strength.  If you are always working on the goals to become better or whatever you are working on .  The easier it will become.  

  Today, Alyvia threw up all over me today.  Even after giving her a bath right after bed time.  I had to get u clean the mess from the bed and get new pjs.  During this time I was getting frustrated but there was a part of me that said Keep it under control and don't do anything or say anything stupid that you might regret.  It didn't help when Hazel was screaming so loud which was giving me a headache.  I wanted to stop and cry.  but Alyvia needed to be taken care and Hazel needs to get to sleep.  Hazel has a wonderful gift.  She is a nurturer and knows when to calm down and always is compassionate with me.  Immediately, she says okay mom  I am going to bed kisses Lala and looks deep into my eyes and says I love you with a giggle and a warm hug.  30 secs later she was out.  I texted Dad while in class cause I was still a little exhausted.. 

     

      "When you feel like playing games just to socialize with your friends just think of me... I have no friends to talk to.  I don't have a car to get out with my kids for fun.  I get throw up all over me and no shower for a few days because my husband insists on showering every morning.  I have to be creative with things to do because i'm Hazels only friend.  I don't have time to go out and do things just for myself.  I make sure the house tries to stay clean and the laundry is done.  No one ever cares to see how I'm doing but all that doesn't matter because my first glance at Hazel in my arms I wanted nothing more than just to be the best Mom I can for her.  I don't care if I don't have friends because my friends are my girls and U.  I don'te mind not having a car (yah it's hard sometimes) I'm just grateful for what I have.  Sometimes I just want to let the tv entertain Hazel so I can just have my time.  I never fall for that because my time is with Hazel.  I can go on and on and make excuses and wishes but there never going to be better than what I have now.  It just Excuses.  I am meant to work hard and live the moments.  Moments with my famil.  Next time when you feel like playing for  fun, know you have it easier but also know I wouldn't trade anything but being a Mom  Life is wonderful and I love you!"

After texting this to Dad, I felt better.  I was happy where I was at.  Hazel is nothing but Amazing!! All I want for her is simply the best.  She's is an example to me.  I learn from her alot.  She has such great energy behind her. You can learn from your own kids.  I do!  Hazel Thank you for your patience!  I love you alot and admire you even at 2 years old!   Your my rock

Mom

Lala's 3 months Pictures!!

Lala is already 3 months today!   It just feels like a few days ago I just found out I was pregnant and was so excited!! Time sure do fly fast these days especially when you have two wonderful kids that keep you on your toes.  I went to JCPenny to get her pictures taken.  We were able to take Annie with us.  It's so much fun taking that little girl and Hazel sure loved it.  Annie and her are best bud.  I couldn't ask for a better best friend for Hazel than Annahli.
  I have been trying to teach Hazel not to wonder off by herself without one of her parents to keep an eye on her.  She is so independent, wants to explore new things, test boundaries and helping out.  Of course there's always a limit when you go just to far.  We been getting on her case about opening the door and leaving outside without her parents.  It's really hard to explain to her reasons why she can't go outside by herself.  Why it's not safe.  The world has cruel things going on these days.  I just want to keep my girls safe as much as I can.  How do I explain this without saying people would like to do things to you that's not nice..  People take you away.  You won't ever see  mommy or daddy again.  Both of us will be sad.  This is one of the hardest things I have come to teach but it's quite one of the most important one for her to learn.  How do I go about telling her in a way she'll understand?  This is something I am going to research on how other parents taught there little one.  Hazel talks to strangers all the time.  I have to tell her no you don't need to say I love you to someone you don't know.  Be careful to not getting to comfortable.  This is something that I need to learn to teach her in an appropriate behavior.  You can easily say something and a person views a differently.   I need her to know this in a way for her protection.  

 lala was hungry.  I asked the photographer to take this picture.  This is Lala, she does this alot.  I love it!! She wouldn't smile for or look at the camera.  The photographer was focus more on rushing us out rather than spending time making good memories for the customers.  It was awkward.  She kept yelling at Hazel like she was her mom, I didn't like that one bit.

Spreading Light to others.  Word of mouth is more than just spreading rumors; it's also a way to help out others.  Many of us learn something new and promptly sit on the information.  Instead of keeping this new found knowledge to our self why not help out someone else?  Take a new lesson or a skill you have learned and share it, and hopefully a friend will return the favor to you.  

LIFE is Worth living

I remember being frustrated over things about life I couldn't quite understand or how adults couldn't see the way I saw things.  I was very logical person.  I questioned myself alot and wanted answer right way.  Of course, I had to wait.  That's the cool thing, you don't know when +or how your answer will be revealed.  Maybe we just have to go through a little bit more experience before getting the answer.  Heavenly Father does guide us always, if we are willing to trust in him and let him be our guides. Our angels are wonderful beings.   I want to be an angel a pure loving kind angel.  I am learning to be more compassionate and affectionate to my kids.  I think it's important to express intimate love to my kids.  Of course not in a sick way that is just pure wrong!  I Love my girls.  They are the best and I can't help but brag about them.  They are smart, Beautiful, kind, sweet, funny, etc.. I am so lucky to have them.

I am always trying to work to become a better person.  The kind of person Heavenly Father would be pleased with.  I have a lot to become that amazing person, but working on it each day means more than not working at all.
   We all have someone in our lifes be it a sister, brother, or mother, father or even friend and you just want them to have a perfect life.  You don't want to see them struggle, you care for them.  You love them dearly.  They don't realize in extent how much you care for that individual.  You want to take away there worries.  You end worrying about their future. Lalalal so you understand what I mean?  I am pretty sure that we all have that someone.  Anyways, I have a particular one i've struggled with for a few years.  I love this person.  I wanted to help them but realized I was hurting our relationship more than ever.  We are not close as we use to be.  This person probably see's me differently or didn't understand why I did such a thing.  Views me more of a judgmental person.  When That was never my intention.  I was sad.  I've done alot of praying.  Like i said earlier you don't get answers right way, we have to experience things, boundaries.
    I am happy now.  I realize that everyone has a different purpose in life, we mature on different levels.  We don't know their story, what's actually happening.  The things is IT'S not my business.  We all of our choice, we need to respect  the choice and move on.  Always with LOVE and LIGHT.  Never get your feeling to emotion to attached it becomes a wreck.  It's not worth it.  Everyone is a child of God!

It's been easier to be around people now that I have a different view of seeing them.  Judging them not!! who  gave me the privilege to judge or critique someone?   God is the highest person of us all and he did not give me this gift.  I am a mother now, with two wonderful gorgeous talented gifted kids.  1 sweet husband.  My focus is on them prepare myself to lead my kids into independence.  this the gift God gave me to be a mom!  I couldn't have ask for anything better. I am the #1 person that can influence their life so I need to shape up my own life and set example to them.  The world is wicked but I can teach them the right way! GO GIRLS!! pomp pomp.  Ya right can see me being a cheerleader?  hehe.  crazy

When you think your life is a kayos,  or messed up or you don't feel appreciated?  The pasture on the other side is greener than your's take this advice:  water your pasture to make it the green you want it.  work on the things that your struggling with!  We don't know how our neighbors problems are? or the struggles they might be going throught,  We might think they have it easy.  maybe they do.. but maybe they are good at hiding it and revealing positive things.  Be grateful your husband didn't get his legs amputated, and your stuck with 2 sets of twin boys to take care of.  Thank goodness you haven't lost a close love one recently.  Thank goodness you are not in prison for something you didn't do or your house got swept away in a tornado, or hurricane.  Before pointing I wish... Say I appreciate and give thanks!! :) Cheers I love you all

I love you BOBBY, Hazel and LALA  Good night

Love MOM

Lala giggles at Hazel

Today was a wonderful I was holding Lala buzzing her around in the air like she was some kind of bee.  I did this with Hazel when she was a baby.  Lala and Hazel are Identical.  They look, act, smile, giggles the same only difference is Lala has acid reflex and three birthmarks.  As I was buzzing Lala around up in the air ding dong ding dong as she came down.  Hazel comes running onto the bed.  Mom, will you do this to me?  Of course with cute face she had on I took her and did the same.  We went back and forth with Hazel than LaLa... Can you believe my arms are getting weak from the difference in weight.  I enjoyed it.  

  Hazel started to jump.  Lala watches carefully and giggles and giggles when she falls on her bum.  This is one of the first giggles that's lasted for minutes.  I was so happy to experience it what a bond LaLa and Hazel have.  It's so cute.  Hazel continues to jump around to see her little sister laugh.  

Hazel is something.  Very obedient and smart.  She is two years old and knows how to read, and looks forward to Lessons everyday.  You can tell Hazel a word or something and when asked later in a few days.  She knows it.  Hazel has been a wonderful baby for me.  Even though she is older she will always be my little baby Hazel.  Today, she helped me put away Lala's 0-3 months clothes and brought out 3-6month.  She's so mature for her age.  I try my best to enjoy all these moments.  Thanks to this blog I can jawed down these moment and not have my computer crash and loose everything.  

Lala when she wakes up she has Hazel right there in her face singing Lala o Lollipop o laliby o lala.. Of course Lala would perfer waking up to having mommy right there with chow.  Of course, that's not the case. Hazel holding her lala still groggy trying to wake up but being swung around by excitement from Hazel.  Lala now figured out she grabs onto Hazel's Hair and Screams as loud as she can until she gets moms Chow.  Of course after her chow Lala acts like nothing had happens and enjoys having Haze around.  

A stronger Relationship

I am so lucky to have Bobby in my life!  I think about how amazing of a husband he is and of course a father.    Today I express gratitude to my Heavenly Father for bringing Bobby into my life.  Before I had met him, I jawed down on a piece of paper of what I wanted my future husband to be like.  On that paper, I purposely wrote I don't want him to be perfect but I want him to have some sort of weakness that I may be able to help him out and he would be able to help me out.  Of course, Heavenly Father gives him a weakness that I am totally against.  Haha can you imagine that.  I don't regret it going through it,  It had helped me to be more patient and understanding.  I was able to come to an understanding why Bobby went through that and why he did it.  

 My husband could of easily given up on me, and chose a different path that was much easier for him.  That's what I admire about him.  He wanted to be a better person!   He loved me for who I was and wanted what I had. Bobby has always treated me with respect, kindness.  He being able to trust me enough to guide him these past 3 years to see success brought within meant a lot.  Bobby and I work as a team.  First, it was recognizing one another boundaries, learning each others fears, excitement, sucessess, coming to an understanding that blaming won't solve any issue.  Wanting a better relationship requires love for one another.  Seeing that person as an Individual.  Not judging their flaws. 

Bobby and I are always trying to find ways to become a better person.  The cool thing about us is we are able to look within our self and find false and bring it up to see how we can tweak it and work at it become better.  Our goal is to be the best parents for our wonderful two kids and a amazing spouse for each other.  Learning to love those around us without contention.  Of course, it does take practice.  You need to really want to work at to see any result.  It's amazing when your struggled with a certain something and your down at the bottom of the mountain looking up.  What's going through your head is NEGATIVITY, anything to get you not to climb that mountain because it requires work and of course the first few steps are the hardest.  If you truly are wanting to be better you have to take the step and take whatever struggles that come your way.  IF you always remember the result that comes to it you'll just keep going higher sooner than you think you will be in the middle looking down saying " that wasn't to bad!"  Then when your to the top you'll Say " WOW that was an amazing experiment I learned alot That was a piece cake! I can't believe i  thought those things"    once your to the top your back to the bottom starting all over again to something new.  LIFE is wonderful.  My Bobby is wonderful.  

  Bobby text me this cute message: 

"I want to say thank you so much sweetie.  Thank you for your desire to strengthen our relationship.  All the efforts you do to bring a smile on my face really mean a lot to me.  The best things is when I do smile, or whenever you do something for me, it does so much more for me than what you see.  Every smile carries behind it the knowledge that i came from you, and makes me feel not just special, but truly honored to have the gift from such an amazing person.  some that I should be giving gifts to because of how special to me you are.  Everything that comes from you I hold close because you are the closest to my heart.  I love you with the kind of love that never dies.  The kind of love that I hold as my most prized possession.  You are the best person I have ever met, and the fact that I am with you and that you actually want to be with me is a concept too wonderful and I am happier than ever that it is what's happening.  I love you with all my heart.  I have more respect and honor for you than anything else  I have ever known".- Bobby

  This made my day.  It's always nice to get a wonderful kind note that My Bobby appreciates and thinking of me.  Thanks Honey!

I love you

A Healthy Relationship

Sweetie,

I wanted to write this letter to let you know that I am thinking about you and that I love you so much. I know we have our differences and we were made into two different people, but I believe we were made us just for each other. I appreciate all that you have done for me and all that you continue to do to show your love for me. Thank You!

You make me smile when I don’t feel like smiling; you make me happy when I am sad and you bring joy and peace into my everyday worries. For that, I am so blessed to have you as my spouse and I am thankful for you every day.

I cherish each day I can wake up next to you and spend time together, whether it’s a lot of time or a small block of time. I also cherish each night that  we share our bed together; knowing that we can end our night as one holding each other, and letting go of the worries from that day.

I often ask the question, “Can I really be this blessed to have you in my life?” My answer is always a resounding yes because how can I complain about someone as wonderful as you are. You were wonderful enough for me to marry you, so I know that what made you so special back then is still shining bright in you.

On this day, I wanted to thank you for loving me, thank you for putting up with me, thank you for being patient with me, thank you for making me smile, thank you for serving me and most of all, thank you for being the wonderful person that I have come to love so much.

Please forgive me if I have ever done or said anything to hurt you, because I want us walk this journey together in love and a renewed commitment to each other.

I love you

Love Always

Fatty